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The woman with three cats sitting across the table from you doesn’t want to hear about how you could never date a woman with pets, the possible exception being if you have an extreme allergy of some sort, in which case you probably should have noted that in your online dating profile.

You simply don’t need to recite a catalog of characteristics you require your girlfriend to have or an inventory of activities in which she must express interest.

While I can’t tell you what to wear—that’s a far too personal and subjective choice—I can tell you some topics to avoid if you’re hoping to have a chance of turning happy hour into happily ever after.

The “ex factor” Exes: We all have them and they’re bound to come up in conversation sooner rather than later. If you can’t avoid the topic completely on the first date—your new friend could very well bring it up—you still have a choice in how you address it.

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Or you can go with, “Oh my god, what a nightmare she is!

Even though we’ve been split for two years she’s still sleeping on my sofa.

You finally mustered the nerve to ask her out, perhaps even using one of the tips I shared in a prior edition of “Lesbian dating 101.” Now you’re counting down the hours until Friday night when you’ll be meeting for happy hour at the local lesbian watering hole.

If your date is someone you met online and, as a result, don’t know very well, you may be more than a little nervous worrying about how to make a good impression at that first encounter.