Learn to do it yourself, something my mother forced me to do. They are used to getting attention all the time, so if you shower her with it, she might lose interest quickly.
Then you can share these responsibilities like you someday can share the tab when you go out. At the same time, if you don’t show her enough, she can easily find someone who will.
I’m simply going to tell you some of my experiences in nearly three years living here, as well as information I’ve gathered from friends, both Colombian and foreign, men and women, and then you can decide what you want to do with it. I’m not saying it can’t happen, I’m just saying it’s less likely. Now that I think about it, it’s not all that different here. Other people have had success with online dating sites.
If you are planning to meet a woman at a club, a salsa club is probably the best kind of venue. My favorite avenue is through mutual friends, a situation that makes me feel most comfortable.
Sometimes they bring friends to feel safe, sometimes because parents mandate it.
I know this can be annoying, just like paying for a woman’s taxi can seem ridiculous, but you have to decide what’s best for you. That a woman doesn’t bring a friend and pays for her own taxi.
Women are typically there to dance to music that does not encourage them to grind with you, as reggaeton does. Or maybe try going to the theater or other cultural events.
My friend Tatiana, the pretty and popular receptionist at The Wandering Paisa, met her boyfriend while she was waiting to see a play. You can’t really expect a woman to be on time in Colombia.
You might meet one who will probably even treat you to a meal here and there, or as they say here, “invite” you. In the beginning, you might have to pay for almost everything but that could change over time.
It’s hard to expect anybody to be on time in Colombia. Here’s a good one, courtesy of my friend Jessie, a Miami native born to Ecuadorian parents who now has a paisa girlfriend: “If you want to meet up at 7 p.m., set the date for .
It’s just not part of the culture, and for the record, it’s not part of mine in Hawaii either. If she tells you she’s on the way, that means she’s about to take a shower.” It is, of course, better than another scenario when they change their mind and don’t bother to call, leaving you waiting, wondering.
You should be able to talk about something interesting, maybe a book you read recently or a great place you traveled, maybe something you saw on the news the day before. I understand there are cases in which you will not know. I know, you’re backpacking, you’re running around trying to see the sights. Hygiene is a big deal in Medellín so if you want to compete with the Colombian guys and other foreigners, shower at least once a day, twice if you had to do something that caused you to sweat throughout the day. Just don’t take it too far and overload the cologne like some paisa guys do. I’ve seen guys go out of their way to prove how much money they have, the way they take out a whole wad of it when they’re paying for something small, just because there are pretty girls around. A former mentor from my journalism days used to take things to the other extreme.
A friend of mine found out a woman he was seeing has a boyfriend when they got back from a lunch date and he was waiting for her at the salon where she works. But I witnessed one incident where a Colombian woman was kissing someone at an event that caters to foreigners, and one of those foreigners still hit on her. Maybe she said, “It’s nothing serious,” but that doesn’t matter. The concept of less is more is lost on a lot of them. His first girlfriend broke up with him for being dirt poor and made him feel ashamed of his mother.